I built this because I needed it, and it didn't exist yet
I moved from Suriname to the Netherlands when I was five. I learned fast how to fit in, how to sound right, how to become whoever the room needed. I got good at it. Too good.
That showed up everywhere, including in who I loved. I'm queer, and for years I kept relationships hidden, even from people close to me. Not because I was ashamed of who I loved, but because some part of me had learned that being fully seen wasn't safe.
By my thirties I had the career too. Almost nine years leading change inside companies, the kind of jobs that pays well and looks right on paper. I was also completely exhausted, and I couldn't explain why, because from the outside nothing was wrong.
What I found, eventually, was that a lot of what I thought I had to do to be loved, the hiding, the overachieving, the constant adjusting, wasn't just mine or a flaw. And I couldn't understand it by looking at just one part of the puzzle. It took looking at where it came from, which part of me was still running the old show, and what my body was holding onto that my mind had already tried to explain away through talk therapy.
So that's how I work now. From every angle at once, not just one. Where a pattern actually started. The part of you still carrying it. And what your body's been holding this whole time.
That became Personal Change Lab. First for myself, then for the women, queer people, creatives, sensitive souls who kept showing up in my life describing the exact same thing. We're not broken. We're just crowded.
THE PRACTICAL BITS
Almost a decade in corporate change management before this
A parts-work approach, learned through an online IFS circle, combined with 2 years (and counting) craniosacral therapy training
Over 500 clients since
Based in Rotterdam. Usually has chocolate nearby. Can't watch a show without accidentally analysing the family dynamics of every character in it.